Hey everyone, there is no usual diary entry for yesterday I’m afraid as I had one of the hardest days ever and just didn’t feel up to writing at any point. I’m really sorry but hopefully I can get back into it today and try and explain a bit of what’s been happening. I hope everyone is safe and well and has a lovely day in the sunshine though. I think my day will involve watching all the High School Musicals and playing Animal Crossing for hours (so pretty normal to be honest) to cheer myself up a bit.
All I can say for now is that I’m really struggling and am considering leaving tomorrow due to numerous factors that have arisen over the past few days. I don’t think being here is helpful for me as I am having numerous daily panic attacks and am crying constantly. I have considered all the alternatives greatly and spoken to the nurses but ultimately I will find out tomorrow in my CTM what happens next. I really hope I haven’t let everyone down as I know my family is disappointed in me but luckily I have found a place to stay for now.
I can’t stress enough that this is not me giving up. The endpoint (being a healthy weight) is still the same and I will still get there, I’m just taking a different path that’s healthier for me. I hope you can understand this and support my decision.
Thank you and sorry.
Lots of love as always,
Leith xxxx
You have tried so hard and achieved so much. The decision is yours and your mum will support you. Try and keep positive. God Bless 💕
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